Inner Renovations, Poetry & Musings

broken forgiveness.

forgiveness

I struggle with forgiveness.

It’s easy to talk about letting go and letting God.

But doing so is one of my greatest challenges.

Giving up control is an almost impossible feat for a control freak.

Letting go is a tall order when I am used to holding on to everything for dear life.

Loving with a broken heart, trusting through broken faith,

smiling through pain is difficult for even the most well put together of us.

Some of us have mastered the art of falling apart

and putting ourselves back together again before anyone notices.

Put back together so well that you have to get up close and personal to notice the cracks –

this being the reason for my distance.

It comes easy for some; saying the right thing, feeling the right way,

even knowing what’s right in the first place.

Often times, I can’t tell.

I express what’s in my heart, say what’s on my mind,

and have too many feelings at one time to know what is right.

Often, I am wrong.

People struggle to forgive me.

They talk about letting go and letting God.

But doing so is one their greatest challenges.

 

Christ-Centered Cognitions, Inner Renovations

Tapping Into Your Energy Reserve

“Love not sleep, lest thou come to poverty;

Open thine eyes, and thou shalt be satisfied with bread.”

~Proverbs 20:13

Running Uphill

The day drags on and it seems as if you don’t have another ounce of energy to give. Even breathing seems to take too much of an effort. Every blink burns with the desire to keep the eyes closed. Sleep is the most attractive thing on Earth to you right now. But you know sleep is the last thing you’ll get. With more work to do than hours in the day, and without the luxury of handmaids, manservants, and assistants – the success or failure of your projects are all… on… you.

The smartest thing we can do is stay connected to a power greater than ourselves. We are people of great faith, but sometimes even that falters. We need to be understood and forgiven in our times of weakness, and for doors to still be opened to us even when we experience a period of doubt. Our minds and bodies are incredible systems that have accomplished tremendous psychological and physical feats, but sometimes it feels like it can’t go another step without some rejuvenation. This is when we need something more powerful than us to energize our spirits and help us see things through in miraculous ways. Skill, talent, and ability mean little if there is no sense of direction or motivation; and until we understand that all things should be used for the glory of God, we are aimless.

Remaining on track, remembering all of the things that need to be done to stay ahead, and keeping the faith can be exhausting. But we must keep going. We must love our destiny more than we love sleep. We must love opportunities in our children’s futures more than we love rest. We must believe in the power and favor of our Lord more than we believe in the possibility of our failure. Living by the P.U.S.H. philosophy, we Pray Until Something Happens. This way of life is not an easy one and is not for the faint at heart. It is for those who somehow find that extra bit of energy when they thought they had nothing left to give, who ran a couple of more miles after they considered stopping after mile one, and who know that if they just keep putting one foot in front of the other God will make a way to reach their destination.

Being too tired to fulfill our dreams and God’s intended purpose for us leaves us poor in spirit and poor in life. But opening our hearts and eyes to His unlimited power propels us forward from within, feeding our spirits with the bread of life, and turning His highest vision for us into our reality.

~ CCB