Inner Renovations

Surprise, You’re Human

Nobody is perfect.  This isn’t news.  Yet, when we make mistakes, we hold ourselves to the most ridiculous standards of perfection.  As if you’re never supposed to feel awkward, or have an embarrassing moment, or mess up really really badly sometimes.  If people could hear the way you talk to yourself in your head, I bet they would say “WHOA! Take it easy – that’s kind of abusive.”  The inner-dialogue of some individuals is nothing short of verbally and emotionally abusive. Self-abusive.  It’s easy to spot when someone else is doing it, but is it as noticeable when you’re doing it to yourself?

Learn to stay friends with yourself even when you make a mistake.  There are so many people in your life that already do a great job at making you feel like a jerk.  They don’t need your help.  Why join the opposing team (the naysayers, haters, and negative-nancys) who love seeing you down?  Somebody has to stay in your corner, and who better than you!?  You know yourself better than anyone.  You know what you’ve been through.  You don’t take your experiences out of context because you know the WHOLE story from front to end.  That in and of itself is enough to garner your own respect because through it all YOU ARE STILL STANDING!  Maybe a little dusty from a few rolls in the dirt but STANDING NO LESS!

Make sure your inner-dialogue sounds something like the way you’d talk to a child you love.  You’d want that little kid to know that we all make mistakes sometimes and that things can go better the next time.  It would break your heart to see them give up and check out from embarrassment.  Wouldn’t you step in and let them know they are more than this slip-up?  Encourage yourself in the same way.  Tell yourself to brush your shoulders off and get back to being amazing.

Give yourself permission to be human.  Practice telling yourself “I’m okay.”  Cool little snippets like, “This too shall pass” work wonders when you’re having to “Push through” difficult moments.  Take yourself seriously enough, but not too seriously.  I mean, how boring would it be if we didn’t have something silly to look back on and laugh at sometimes?  Be willing to be silly, to look silly, and to shake your head at it and be on your way.

We’re so good at putting pressure on ourselves.  How good are we at taking some off?  Maybe as a mini-practice we could go through the rest of this week noticing our little faux-pas (which are kind of inevitable), and instead of getting in a tizzy about it, we remind ourselves of how awesome it is to be human.

Inner Renovations, Therapeutic Yoga

Off The Mat Into The Fiery World

yoga elements

I’ve come to the conclusion that it is better to do something, anything – take some action, any action, rather than do nothing at all for too long. Yes, there are times when we need to listen to that inner voice and simply be still. But if we’re still all the time then we won’t get anything done. Let’s not allow our zen to highjack the work we must do to accomplish our destiny. It is so attractive to roll out the mat day after day, stretching and releasing the tension and just allowing ourselves to escape the drama of the day by sinking deeply into our space of personal peace and connection to All That Is. “Just leave me alone in my little world. Let me stay in my quietude in the private corners of my life – undisturbed by you.” But if that is ALL we do, we are quite literally defeating our own purpose.

What we learn on the mat, and in meditation we must take off the mat and into the world to put our wisdom to use. The peace that we’ve cultivated isn’t simply so that we can drift off into our private heavens while ignoring our reality, but to go out and be able to face the challenges of our reality while using our skill to work through the tension and return to harmony.

I only write things that I have to remind myself of. As a counselor, I do have the opportunity to share with others insights and skills developed, not only through clinical training, but also through the intuition and increased awareness that comes in meditation as you learn to listen to the voice within and experience the multiple ways that people communicate with each other – even when they’re not talking. I remind myself that all of our wisdom and understanding is only of use if we are contributing to the progress of our spirits and healing of hearts as a human family. I hope that you remind yourself of this too. To close the books sometimes and take what you’ve learned and teach someone. And to come out of your sanctuary and go into the streets to share what the Lord has been speaking to you. It is so attractive to stay comfortable in our personal spaces, experiencing the peace and balance that often comes with solitude, but the real test of our growth and balance is when we can maintain that state while interacting with our brothers and sisters in this fiery world.

~ CCB